A Debt
by amixdeuxgirl
Summary: Gale saved my life. Because surely I would have died inside, had he not come along. And I don't know how I'll ever be able to repay him. One-shot as of now, will possibly continue. Gadge 5ever.
1. Chapter 1

I step out of the apothecary and admire the weather. The sunshine glints of my blonde waves and my green dress looks especially bright. The weather's been good as of late, and I'm glad, because of the toll the recent cold weather had taken on the district. I feel a slight breeze and welcome it as I sigh, continuing on my journey back home.

Father had asked me to get some minor pain medications, because mother uses these if she feels well enough for anything other than morphling. I am lost in thought about my mother's condition when I'm grabbed and pulled into an alley.

Startled, I wrench my grip from the offending hand and turn to face my... Attacker? Kidnapper?

There are two men leering at me. I gulp. They're from the Seam, and not the nicer part. I've heard stories like this; town women stolen and taken advantage of. Used, because we have money. Abused because we don't starve. I'm terrified.

The taller one, the lighter brown haired one, leans forward and says, "Hey, pretty. What d'you have there? Mind if I see?" He gives me a sinister smile and snatches my apothecary package.

"No!" I protest, "I need that."

"_Please."_ I beg. I'm so scared. _What will they do to me? Are they that cruel, to take advantage of me, in this alley? _

He merely raises an eyebrow at me and rifles through the package. I look around me, and try to inch my way away from them, but the other man spots me and throws his arm over my throat, effectively keeping me up against the wall. I'm choking.

"Ah-ah-ah, little lady. You're not going anywhere." My eyes swim with tears. The taller one comes drops the package and comes forward. _This is it. _I think. _Please, God, no. _

One of them, I can't see which one through my tears, reaches up to my chest.

_No._

The other one touches the hem of my skirt.

There's a hand on my thigh.

_NO._

One button is undone. Another one follows.

I squeeze my eyes shut. _I want to die._

And all of a sudden, the hands are gone. I hear commotion a few feet away. Blinking, I look up and see the taller man getting punched. The other one is already on the ground. I hear my savior say something, but I only catch snippets.

"Innocent". "Disgusting." "Go to hell." "Run, you coward!"

I've slidden down the wall, my tears have finally escaped. I only hear the sounds of running feet on the cobblestones.

I feel warm, gentle hands on my arms.

"Are you okay?" My savior asks. I can't do a thing but whimper.

He, whoever he is, scoops me up and makes soothing shh-ing noises, while I sniffle into his shirt. He smells like the earth and rain and fire. After a few minutes of walking I feel myself being lifted onto a table. I finally look up to see my savior.

What I see are dark grey eyes, in them a mixture of worry and relief. I take in his perfectly tanned skin, his strong jaw. I see his dark mussed hair, and note the bruise on his cheek.

I look away, embarassed at how he found me, he, who always occupies my mind. _Why him?_ I don't like this train of thought and decide to pay attention to the older blonde woman fussing over me; the bruises on my neck and the one on my thigh.

My savior says a few words to the woman, takes one last look at me, and leaves.

I try not to think of my savior and his beautiful eyes. I try not to think of the bruise on his cheek. I try not to think about how Gale Hawthorne just saved my life. Because I surely would have died inside had those men gotten what they wanted. Gale saved me. And I had no idea how I could ever repay him.


	2. Chapter 2

As the woman is finishing up, a familiar face bursts in. The look she has on her face would be almost comical, had the situation been different.

"Katniss?" I ask, confused.

I look up at the woman and it dawns on me. _So this is Mrs. Everdeen. This is Katniss's house? _I've never been in her house before. We always studied at my house, sometimes I'd play piano for her. We're quiet friends, we're there for each other, but we don't speak much.

"Madge?" Katniss looks just as confused as I did. "What're you doing here, what happened?" She drops her game bag in the kitchen, walks up to me, and stops cold when she sees my bruises.

I squeeze my eyes shut, embarassed. She's always so strong, and here I am, covered in bruises. _Weak. _God, what kind of person just lets themselves get dragged into an alley, anyway?

_I should've fought more. _The memories come back, assaulting me. _No, I did fine. I couldn't think straight, I - _

_Katniss would've fought. _An evil voice says. _She would've gotten away. Weak. No wonder Gale loves her. _

_She's my best friend. _I argue. _I wouldn't have wanted her to be in that position anyways. _

Katniss comes over to me, examining the bruises. "What happened?"

"I- I don't want to talk about it." She looks into my eyes intently, as if asking me how she can help. I look away, uncomfortable. She reaches for me and hesitantly hugs me. I break down.

In the background I hear the sounds of her mother bustling about in the kitchen, and she brings some tea. Katniss is making soothing noises into my hair. I feel guilty for breaking down in her house, because she has so little and I have so much. I don't deserve to cry. I feel guilty for taking the tea, and drinking out of the chipped and cracked little cup. I feel guilty, but I can't seem to stop.

I think I fell asleep, because the next thing I know my father is there, thanking the Everdeens and scooping me up and carrying me home.

Our maid Eva helps him settle me in to my bed, and I fall asleep fast.

I miss two days of school. During the first day, my father questioned me, demanding to know the culprits. I honestly don't care. I want to forget it all, everything about that night. Well, everything except Gale. His eyes. The smells of the woods that clung to his shirt. That night I'm plagued by nightmares.

The next morning I feel slightly better. I give myself a pep talk to get out of bed. I scrub my body in the shower. I think of the man's hands. One, two, three times. I step out and I look at myself in the mirror. The bruises are dark purple and green. My naked body looks so vulnerable I'm almost disgusted and hurry to get dressed. I give myself a pep talk to go downstairs. I give myself a pep talk to eat, too, though Eva helps a bit with that.

"Madgie," she says, in a motherly tone that seems to only be reserved for me, "You need to eat. You need to get your strength up, sweet." So I do. And for the rest of the day I snack on fruit and read, snuggled up on the couch.

The nightmares come back, again, with renewed vigor. Like my body senses the bit of peace I've been able to get today and is trying to get revenge on me for it. I don't know if I blame it.

The routine repeats itself, though I get bored of the books quite early on. I think of Gale.

How do I repay him? How do you repay the boy you love? He'd see anything I do as charity. And I honestly don't know how he'd react to me even approaching him at school. Disgusted, at how weak I am? Regretting saving me? He's always hated me for my wealth, because he has none. Oh how ironic it is, that I don't give even half a damn about any of that. He thinks my life is perfect. I almost snort aloud.

I get up to get some more tea, am about to pour the sugar in, when I hear a knock on the back door.

I open it, and lo and behold.

Gale.

_Crap._


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: I thought I would explain a bit before I go on. Gale doesn't have a crush on her, at least not in the sense that he feels comfortable showing it. Any feelings he has for her are very deep down. He saved her out of compassion because he's a human being, because his mother drilled respect for women into his head at a young age, and yes, maybe a tiny crush. But it is very much still true that their relationship is awkward and he is resentful of her. Any contact with Madge is a begrudging for him. This relationship isn't going to be extremely romantic, at least not for a while. I mean, that's how I'm trying (hopefully succeeding?) In writing this. I guess you can interpret it how you want, though.

He awkwardly thrusts a bucket of strawberries into my hands. I look from to bucket to him, at a loss. He grunts in annoyance, and looks away uncomfortably. I raise my eyes to look at his, surprised that I see a mixture of concern and annoyance in them. The annoyance I understand, but the worry? How do you interpret _that_? Gale's a mystery.

I move to retrieve some of the coins we keep by the door for these deals, when a hand grabs my wrist. I look at him, surprised, and he snatches his hand back as if he was burned. I wait, look at him questioningly and he sighs, running a hand through his dark hair. _God, _that hair. I wonder what it feels like.

"How are you?" he grudgingly asks.

"Fine." I say softly.

After a small pause, in which I decide whether or not to elaborate, I say, "Thank you. For- you know." I think I blush. Damn this pale skin.

He nods once, seemingly unsure, and nods again as if to reassure himself. Or me? He turns abruptly and walks away, without his money.

"Gale!" I call, once I realize this, "You forgot your money!"

He keeps walking, but the slight jerk of his head and the slight slowing down in his walk at the gate tells me that he is purposefully ignoring me.

I huff, and resolve to give it to him tomorrow at school.

_Oh God, _I think. _School._

The next day, I wake up late. As I rush around my closet, trying to find something suitable to wear, I attempt to put my hair up to make it look like anything other than the bird's nest it was when I woke up. I grab my bag, a small pastry from the kitchen, and I'm off.

Thankfully, the incident has been kept between the Everdeens, my father and Gale, so I don't get any weird stares. At least, not any more than I usually do.

I pass Peeta, the baker's son's locker, and say hi. He walks with me to my first period and we make small talk. He's a sweet guy, really. And I see the way he looks at Katniss, it's adorable. It makes me wish that she had the time and mindset for a relationship, I think they'd be perfect together.

I make it through the school day. At lunch Katniss still looked at me a bit like I was a wounded animal, but I guess that's to be expected, though I wish she'd just forget about it. Like I'm trying to.

At the end of the day, I'm waiting outside by the lockers for Gale. I brought the coins he _ignored._ I am determined to pay him back. If I can't pay him back for rescuing me, then I can pay him back for the damn strawberries. He emerges from a classroom, with his younger brothers in tow. I know the older one's name, Rory, but I can't seem to recall the other one's.

I walk over to them, and set a determined look on my face. Gale sees this and quietly tells his brothers to go on.

"You _forgot _your money." I say, accusingly. Suddenly I'm angry. I don't really know why.

Gale looks at me, disinterested. "You know I did it on purpose."

I don't know what to do. I can't owe him, I _can't. _"Gale, you take this money or- _so help me!"_

I am so angry I'm shaking. My body doesn't seem to know whether to punch something or cry.

Gale seems to realize this and puts his arms around my shoulders, guiding me to the side of the building, by some trees. He makes shhh-ing noises, but I'm still angry so I push hard away from him. My hand flies to my hair. I take a deep breath.

"What's you deal?" Gale says. "I thought you'd be happy not to pay me. Not to 'give your money to a _Seam rat_'."

I snap back towards him, incredulous. "Gale, I _owe_ you! I can't even dream of paying you back for what you did for me, for showing me compassion when you absolutely didn't have to? But I thought I could at least help pay it off with these!" I jiggle the coins. "Here I am, _admiring _you, for your bravery and your kindness, and you still think that I don't care? You think that I don't _care _about what you did for me? Gale Hawthorne." I let out a frustrated laugh, running my hand through my hair. "You really are a mystery."

All throughout my outburst I didn't look at him, too afraid of what I'd see. I finally get the courage to look up at him, and what I see surprises me.

He looks uncomfortable. Surprised. And a little bit impressed?

"You don't have to pay me back, Undersee." He grumbles.

I sigh, my anger gone. "You're not the only one who hates being indebted to people, Gale." This words have a double meaning of course, because of my family's debt to the Capitol. The debt that they won't ever let us pay off because they want the leverage. I hope he understands, because maybe he'll realize that we're not so different. That I'm not the cookie-cutter rich girl he thinks I am. That I have problems, too.

But I don't know if he understands, because all he does is nod, and turn and walk away. He seems to be doing that a lot lately.


	4. Chapter 4

I've been sleeping badly lately. Well. Badly is a bit of an understatement. I have, what, two nightmares a night on average? I relive that night in the alley every day. Whenever I close my eyes, they're there. Oh, God, they're in my head. Those men. I'm disgusted with myself for letting them in. _Weak. _

School's been awful. Before that night, I had always made sure I looked pristine for school. I refused to let the kids have another thing to make fun of me for. I felt stronger when I went to school like that. Now I don't really care. I get stares for the bags under my eyes. My hair is rarely brushed. I don't eat as much as I used to.

Eva's noticed. I feel her eyes follow me everywhere. I mean, I know she's worried, but it's _really _ not helping my post-rape paranoia. I cringe at the word 'rape'. I decide to cut it out of my theoretical mind dictionary. Or whatever that's called.

I venture downstairs on a Saturday morning, smelling Eva's delicious cooking. I say good morning and sit down while she fixes me a plate of scrambled eggs and bacon. Once I'm done eating I get up to put the dishes in the dishwasher, one of the only ones in District 12, and she joins me.

"I think you should go to the bakery and get us a loaf." she says.

I pause, looking at her like she's grown two heads.

"It's been a week. I know it's hard, but you need to start getting over this. You need to work on it, and I think a trip like that will help."

I'm thinking. My mind follows the route to the bakery from my house and it passes the alley no _no _I cannot, _I cannot go there_.

I think Eva realizes this and she puts a hand on my shoulder to calm me down.

"Will you... Come with me?" I say, in a small voice. _Weak._

"Sure, baby." she says, smoothing my hair down. "We'll go in an hour. Can you do that?"

I nod, and head upstairs. I sit on the edge of my bed, trying to ready my mind. I can't get over the alley. I can't get over it. Before I know it my time is up and I hurriedly run a brush through my hair, grab some shoes and get downstairs. Eva is waiting for me with her woven basket and little hat. I inhale deeply and go through the doorway after her.

She tries to distract me by pointing things out in the square. I'm not paying attention, I'm too busy counting the steps until the place where I know the alley is. We get right in front of it and I stop. I can't move. I feel like if I move past the space where the wall is out into the open entrance of the alley I'll get sucked up into it and back to that night. She patiently waits for me at the other side and I give her a pleading look. She starts talking to me, coaching me, and people are staring. I look into the alley like it'll swallow me up. I see a stand on the opposite end of the square, give Eva a look and go over to it. When I get there I promptly turn to go in the direction of Eva, keeping myself at and angle so I'll surely miss the alley. I'm pretty damn proud of myself, but Eva gives me a look like I'm being ridiculous.

We get to the bakery and Eva orders our bread, and I see Peeta.

"Hey! How've you been?" I ask.

He gives me a half-hearted smile and shrugs, in such a way that I get a glimpse of a huge bruise on the back of his jaw.

"Peeta." I breathe, reaching out to touch it and he turns his head to the other side and mumbles, "It's nothing."

I shake my head, I should no better, I don't like people noticing my bruises either. but before I can say anything his mother comes in and demands his help in the kitchen. I walk back over to Eva and she puts her arm around my shoulder as we walk out.

We're just making our way past the jewelery shop when I see them. They're talking to a young woman. Chatting. Oh, God. The men that have plagued my nightmares for the past week are right there, chatting up this other girl. In my mind flash images of them touching her. They grab her skirt. They unbutton her shirt. She's crying. Am I crying?

Oh, God I can't breathe. Did they see me? Where's Eva? I need Eva, Oh God where is she? Is she in the alley, did they get her? I turn franticly, trying to see, trying to find her but nothing in the square is familiar anymore. It's dark and it's scary and _I can't see_.

I breathe in gasps. My hands are clawing my chest, like they're trying to reach in to grab my lungs and make them work. I'm blind. No, that's not true, I see blurs. There's a hand on my shoulder, it feels like Eva but what if it's one of them? Oh God, please don't let them touch me, not again. I feel tears on my face, where am I? Am I screaming? I try to calm down, something in the back of my mind is telling me to calm down. I try to fix my breathing but all I can think of is their hands, their hands everywhere, the alley, the darkness. Gale. I need Gale, where is he? My frazzled mind is trying to make sense of the world around me and all I think of is him. I need him to get these hands off me, _I need him to save me. _In the midst of my panic attack I think I say his name but I don't know, I don't know, I can't remember where I am, I can't see, I can't breathe, I can't. And then darkness envelops me.


End file.
